Day 9
No chemo today. I have one more treatment on Monday but from now till day 21 it’s time for my body to heal and recover from round 1. Been avoiding the crowds because they say day 7-10 is when my white blood cell count is the lowest -if any and I am susceptible to infection. It’s only been a week but seems longer. Days are full of treatments and appointments, various blood tests and checkups. Once in a while I ask June- how are you doing- like how are you really doing. I get the same answer. Fine. Really fine. If I weren’t, I would tell you. I check because I am still amazed at how fine we both are. Those of you who really know me, know that I am a little bit-paranoid, schizo, obsessed, worried and chicken little--the sky is falling type of man. (Don’t knock it, I’ve had some success operating like this.) So when faced with a disease that could potentially harm your life permanently and alter your family’s life- you would think that I would be quite a mess. I have gotten so many encouraging emails from you guys- I was beginning to feel guilty. I told June- this person they are describing, it’s not me, or at least it doesn’t feel like me. I’m just gil, same guy trying to figure out how to sell more coke than last year.
Last week, June read this bible passage about these 3 young men who a certain king was gonna throw into the fire because they wouldn’t bow to the king’s idols and demands. Their response to the king was they knew their God was going to save them- but even if he didn’t, it wouldn’t make a bit of difference. They were still gonna be steadfast in their faith and would not concede to the king’s demands. I thought that was pretty amazing-EVEN IF HE DIDN’T. They were not concerned about the outcome. It was about being faithful. I have seen enough movies to know that when faced with one’s own mortality- there is a fair amount of reminiscing, possible regret and changes in perspective. When I run the movie of my life in my head (brad pitt plays me of course- angelina jolie-june) my biggest regret would be not telling more of my friends about my faith in God. Sharing the word of God and the strength that He provides to stop a Chicken Little like me from screaming the sky is falling. Now being able to share openly with all of you daily, makes me feel vindicated and definitely a lot more hero-esque ala Brad Pitt in Troy or Brad Pitt in Oceans 11 or Brad Pitt in well, you get what I mean…The journey continues…
James 1: 2-4 (New International Version, ©2010)
2 Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters,[a] whenever you face trials of many kinds, 3 because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. 4 Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.
hey buddy, thanks so much for continuing to share from the heart. please know you are encouraging me (and i'm sure all who are reading) with your own faithfulness coming alive at this time.
ReplyDeletehave you noticed brad pitt was always eating or chewing on something in oceans? and yeah, AJ is hot cuz she can pull off something like salt and look cool doing it. plus, she rides motorcycles.